Review

"Romance with a Twist: A Hallmark Movie That Twisted So Hard It Fell Off the Shelf"

Ah, Romance with a Twist, the 2024 cinematic masterpiece that promised to be the Hallmark movie to end all Hallmark movies. And boy, did it deliver—just not in the way anyone expected. If you’ve ever wondered what would happen if a Hallmark holiday movie got drunk on eggnog and tried to reinvent itself, this is the film for you. Spoiler alert: it’s like watching a snowman try to do parkour.

The plot, as per the Hallmark formula, is simple: city girl (let’s call her Holly, because of course) moves to a small town, meets a ruggedly handsome local (let’s call him Pine, because he’s basically a tree with abs), and they fall in love while saving a struggling Christmas tree farm. But wait! There’s a twist! And by twist, I mean the movie takes a hard left into Twilight Zone territory when Holly discovers Pine is actually a time-traveling lumberjack from the 1800s. Yes, you read that right. Hallmark movies have officially entered the multiverse.

The first half of the movie is classic Hallmark holiday movie fare: cozy sweaters, awkward meet-cutes, and enough hot cocoa to drown a reindeer. But then, out of nowhere, Pine whips out a pocket watch and starts monologuing about the space-time continuum. At this point, I half-expected Ryan Reynolds to show up and explain the rules of time travel, but alas, we were left with Pine’s questionable accent and a lot of confused townsfolk.

The chemistry between Holly and Pine is... well, let’s just say it’s about as believable as a Hallmark movie where the lead doesn’t own a single pair of boots. But hey, who needs chemistry when you’ve got time-traveling lumberjacks and a subplot about a sentient Christmas tree named Douglas? (Yes, Douglas talks. No, I’m not kidding.)

By the time the credits rolled, I wasn’t sure if I’d just watched a Hallmark movie or an episode of Doctor Who directed by someone who really loves cinnamon-scented candles. Romance with a Twist is the kind of movie that makes you question your life choices—like why you didn’t just rewatch The Holiday instead. But if you’re in the mood for something that’s equal parts heartwarming and utterly bonkers, this is the film for you. Just don’t blame me if you start side-eyeing your Christmas tree afterward.

Final verdict: 3 out of 5 stars. It’s not a good movie, but it’s definitely a memorable one. And hey, at least it’s not another Hallmark movie about a baker falling in love with a firefighter. Progress, right?